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Friday, December 12, 2003
Today’s List: The Top Five Worst Movies I Have Ever Seen
By Steven Taylor @ 5:12 pm

Yes, there was no list yesterday, but there were two on Wednesday…

File today’s under “Pop Culture”:

Worst Movies I Have Ever Seen

(Not counting ones I have seen on MST3k)

5. Tarzan. The one with Bo Derek. My word that was a boring flick.

4. Red Dawn. Perhaps the worst Cold War movie ever made. The plot expects us to believe that a) the Soviets can take over the US with the help of the Cubans, and then b) part of the invading force could be repelled by a bunch of kids? Yeesh.

3. Johnny Dangerously. All I remember is that we couldn’t finish it, and my Dad, who usually will finish anything, got up to do something else.

2. Mars Attacks!-A movie where truly all the funny parts were in the commercial. The movie itself is nigh unwatchable, and highly, highly unfunny.

1. Howard the Duck. The only movie I paid to go see at the theater that I walked out on. It was utterly horrible. I would note my credulity that George Lucas was involved, but his recent efforts have knocked the bloom off that rose.

(Inspired by Crooked Timber: A name to my pain, which was in turn inspired by Off the Kuff: Movie badness is an issue Americans care deeply about)

If you want to play along, here’s how.

Filed under: Today's List | |Send TrackBack

Off the Kuff linked with Movie badness is an issue Americans care deeply about


  1. “Tarzan” was truly awful.

    But unwatchable? Hardly!

    Turn off the sound, and fastforward to the bits where Bo Derek is naked. Very watchable, indeed.

    Comment by Stephen Green — Friday, December 12, 2003 @ 5:14 pm

  2. Ok, ye hath a point. I do recall that said scene did lead a certain teenage male to watch said flick to learn how boring it indeed was…

    Comment by Steven — Friday, December 12, 2003 @ 5:24 pm

  3. Movie badness is an issue Americans care deeply about
    Much like Dave Barry when he did his Bad Song Survey, I was rather overwhelmed by the response to my…

    Trackback by Off the Kuff — Saturday, December 13, 2003 @ 10:55 am

  4. One word in praise of Red Dawn . . . the mission that caught Saddam this weekend was “Operation Red Dawn.”

    Comment by Matthew Stinson — Sunday, December 14, 2003 @ 2:40 pm

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